Welcome to yet another garbanzo tutorial on the internet that no one asked for. This one teaches you how to pollute PyPI with a shitty and useless package as fast as possible. We’re moving fast. Agility. We’re dialing in the motions of getting from point A to point B. Parkour. Warning: This package will do nothing.

To compete in this speedrun category, you need to complete six achievements:

• version dependencies
• all commits are thoughtful and atomic
• write a test and pass it
• automate testing
• write a README.md
• packaging and publishing to PyPI

Some achievements contain an intro/fetishization as to why I picked them. The hardcore speedrunner can ignore them and follow along with the instructions, but for the trivia nerds out there, feel free to check them.

Version your dependencies

Step 1:

poetry new shitty_project_1797

Note: Make sure you check Pypy and see if your project’s name isn’t already in use and abstain from actually using meaningful names, add some random digits.

Step 2: Enter the new project and open your editor of choice. If you run tree you should be looking at something like this.

.
├── pyproject.toml
├── README.md
├── shitty_package
│   └── __init__.py
└── tests
    └── __init__.py

3 directories, 4 files

All commits are thoughtful

Initialize your repo, after that, assuming you’re using VSCode, install Coventional Commits, do Ctrl+Shift+P, and select Conventional Commits. Select chores. Select No scope. Phew, phew. Search and select for ,tada🎉, which means start of a new project, and write start of speedrun. Every single commit will have to follow this general guideline. Not following this convention will disqualify your run. Keep adding commits in their rights categories as you make changes. Don’t rush, with time you’ll be get to know the available options.

Write a test and pass it

Step 1: Write a simple test for your package. In the tests directory, create a new file named test_shitty_package.py. Inside this file, write a basic test function. Since our package is useless, the test can be as simple as checking if truthy:

def test_shitty_package():
    assert True, "Run, now"

Step 2: Install pytest. In your project’s root directory, run:

poetry add --dev pytest

This will add pytest as a development dependency and update your pyproject.toml file accordingly. To update your env with your new dependency run:

poetry installs --with dev

Step 3: Run the test using pytest. In your terminal, navigate to your project’s root directory and run, don’t forget to activate the environment:

pytest .

If everything is set up correctly, you should see output similar to the following:

============================= test session starts ==============================
platform linux -- Python 3.9.7, pytest-6.2.5, py-1.10.0, pluggy-1.0.0
rootdir: /path/to/shitty_project_1797
collected 1 item

tests/test_shitty_package.py .                                          [100%]

============================== 1 passed in 0.01s ===============================

Automate the testing

To automate the testing of your Python package, we’ll use a simple GitHub Actions workflow:

Step 1: In your project’s root directory, create a new directory named .github, and inside it, create another directory named workflows. Your project structure should now look like this:

.
├── .github
│   └── workflows
├── pyproject.toml
├── README.md
├── shitty_package
│   └── __init__.py
└── tests
    └── __init__.py

Now, pour this YAML nonsense into test.yml:

name: Test

on: [push]

jobs:
  build:

    runs-on: ubuntu-latest
    strategy:
      matrix:
        python-version: ["3.9", "3.10","3.11"]
    steps:
        - name: Checkout Code
          uses: actions/checkout@v3

        - name: Setup Python ${{ matrix.python-version }}
          uses: actions/setup-python@v4
          with:
            python-version: ${{ matrix.python-version }}

        - name: Install Poetry
          uses: snok/install-poetry@v1
          with:
            version: 1.3.2
            virtualenvs-create: false
            virtualenvs-in-project: false
            installer-parallel: true

        - name: Install dependencies
          run: poetry install --with dev

        - name: Run tests and coverage
          run: pytest

Write a README

A well-written README.md file is vital for any project, especially when you’re publishing a Python package. It’s the first thing users see when they come across your package on GitHub or PyPI, and it’s often their first point of reference for understanding what your package does and how to use it. A good README should include information about the package’s purpose, installation instructions, usage examples, and any necessary documentation. While your package is useless, writing a proper README is excellent practice for future projects. Also for bonus points design some kind of banner or logo.

Packaging and publishing to PyPi

In this final step, we’ll package your useless project and publish it to PyPI, making it available for others to ignore, and for some bots to download it.

Step 1: Create a PyPi account

Step 2: Configure poetry to use your PyPi credentials.

Step 4: Package your project

poetry build

Step 5: Publish your project

poetry publish

And there you have it – a complete guide on how to publish a Python package that adds absolutely no value to the world. Perhaps you picked up a thing or two along the way, but let’s be real, this was pretty useless. Congratulations, you’ve achieved peak annoyance, you’re a python speedrunner.